The other Amber and I recently embarked on a road trip with 5 children.
Just us, 5 kids, 4 days, and the open road. What can I say, we're gamblers. Some might say that sounds like a nightmare and that we've suffered a lapse in mental stability, but I like to think we are just fun and brave.
The truth of the matter is that other than my husband, she is the only person I could be trapped in a car with for 16 hours (more on that later) and a whole gaggle of children and not want to stab my eyes out.
In fact, we might even have a little fun.
We have been best friends for nearly 30 years now, which means that beside my immediate family she's been in my life for longer than anyone else I know. There's just an ease between us that's been hard earned over many years. Even when it's hard, it's easy.
Through childhood, adolescence, high school, dating, college, marriage, moves, jobs, and motherhood our friendship has never faltered.
And there is never any drama, which is a rarity among women.
So for all these reasons, and the fact that our children are basically obsessed with each other, we decided to make it an annual tradition to take a road trip. No husbands, no babysitters, no plane rides to exotic places. We do not stock up on car-entertainment or pack fancy bags for each child filled with activities like Pinterest suggests we should.
We go about it the old fashioned way- with loud music, lots of snacks, and making up games like "Let's see who can run to the other end of the sidewalk the fastest" at potty stops.
I know, how archaic.
Although I suppose "old fashioned" might be a slightly generous term considering we had air conditioning, DVD players, and Siri directing our every turn. But let's not get bogged down in the details.
It was after much planning and deliberation (translation: barely any planning and no deliberation) that we decided on Santa Cruz for our first ever Annual Road Trip. It's somewhere neither of us have ever stayed, it has a beach, a boardwalk, and it's not too far away. Win, win, win!
This was very nearly the perfect destination, except that we decided to take the "scenic route" to get there (because remember, we're fun and brave!) which turned our 7 hr trip into a 16 hour marathon. I'm dead serious. I can't even...
I don't even understand.
The whole reason we took the scenic route was to stop at a zoo in Eureka and a famous "sea glass
beach" in Fort Bragg, neither of which we ever laid eyes on.
Fail.
We decided to skip the zoo because it had been raining all morning (In July. So, you know, that totally makes sense) and after adding countless hours of hairpin turns along the coastal highway, Fort Bragg turned out to be Fort Drag. After searching unsuccessfully for the mythical glass beach, we were informed by a kindly older park ranger that, "They really should stop advertising that. All the glass has been picked up, and the tide is coming in anyway, so it's far too dangerous with kids."
Right.
At least there was an ice cream shop.
So back into car we all went, until we finally reached our destination roughly 17,869 hours later.
Luckily the kids were champs. I mean really.
It was Day 1 and they were just happy to be together.
No one threw a fit. Other than us having to tell them "You guys need to work it out" a couple of
times, no one really fought. There wasn't even any crying until the last thirty minutes.
We spent the next couple of days in Santa Cruz where we had some wins and some fails, but overall it was a great time.
There was some highly questionable meat at a Mexican "restaurant" down on the boardwalk.
There was the time we ventured out to the nearby town of Capitola, searched for parking for 12 minutes (which is a long time in a hot car full of pumped up children) , unloaded 2 giant snack bags, 2 beach bags, 5 children, and various beach toys, then trekked a couple of blocks down to the beach only go find it covered in dead fish and crowded with hundreds of children in red swimsuits doing drills in the sand. I'm not sure if it was a lifeguard camp, or a surf camp, or some kind of child-gang,
but the noisy crowd coupled with the pungent dead fish smell was enough to drive us out.
We actually thought about sticking it out, because all the other people didn't seem to mind or even notice the fact that we were surrounded by sandy, lifeless sardines- but then V started stabbing a dead fish with her sand shovel... and all it takes is one fish head landing by your towel to send you packing.
There was the time we went to the boardwalk and immediately decided we hated it. It was hot, dirty, crowded, none of the kids were into it, and a certain little boy proceeded to cry for a half hour upon arriving when he didn't win a Ninja Turtle prize after I paid $10 for him to throw 3 balls in about 4 seconds.
The carnival business is quite a racket.
There was the surprisingly hostile environment at the Jelly Belly factory where on two separate occasions old women were quite sour, for being in such a sweet place.
Ah, but let's not forget the wins!
There was a delightful little restaurant called The Buttery...so that obviously needs no further explanation.
There were giggles and squeals and hours of play on the beach.
There were sea lions off the pier. There was a quaint little lighthouse we discovered near the beach.
There was a moment in a Taco Bell on the last leg of our drive home, when the kids were coming unhinged and we were exhausted- we were basically a moving spectacle by this point- and when someone cracked a joke we just looked at each other, burst out laughing, and kept laughing until tears ran down our cheeks and the other Amber choked on her crunchy taco. It was awesome. After all, there aren't many things I enjoy more than a hearty laugh over a crunchy taco.
There was bonding and laughter and memories made
- which was exactly why we did it.
And we're all still friends.
My kids waited all of 15 hours after coming home before requesting to see their 3 beloved girls again, so clearly all is still right in the universe.
The Ambers are definitely fun and brave enough to continue the roadtrip tradition next year- although
we did learn a few things for next time:
Happy roadtrippin' y'all!
Just us, 5 kids, 4 days, and the open road. What can I say, we're gamblers. Some might say that sounds like a nightmare and that we've suffered a lapse in mental stability, but I like to think we are just fun and brave.
The truth of the matter is that other than my husband, she is the only person I could be trapped in a car with for 16 hours (more on that later) and a whole gaggle of children and not want to stab my eyes out.
In fact, we might even have a little fun.
We have been best friends for nearly 30 years now, which means that beside my immediate family she's been in my life for longer than anyone else I know. There's just an ease between us that's been hard earned over many years. Even when it's hard, it's easy.
Through childhood, adolescence, high school, dating, college, marriage, moves, jobs, and motherhood our friendship has never faltered.
And there is never any drama, which is a rarity among women.
So for all these reasons, and the fact that our children are basically obsessed with each other, we decided to make it an annual tradition to take a road trip. No husbands, no babysitters, no plane rides to exotic places. We do not stock up on car-entertainment or pack fancy bags for each child filled with activities like Pinterest suggests we should.
We go about it the old fashioned way- with loud music, lots of snacks, and making up games like "Let's see who can run to the other end of the sidewalk the fastest" at potty stops.
I know, how archaic.
Although I suppose "old fashioned" might be a slightly generous term considering we had air conditioning, DVD players, and Siri directing our every turn. But let's not get bogged down in the details.
It was after much planning and deliberation (translation: barely any planning and no deliberation) that we decided on Santa Cruz for our first ever Annual Road Trip. It's somewhere neither of us have ever stayed, it has a beach, a boardwalk, and it's not too far away. Win, win, win!
This was very nearly the perfect destination, except that we decided to take the "scenic route" to get there (because remember, we're fun and brave!) which turned our 7 hr trip into a 16 hour marathon. I'm dead serious. I can't even...
I don't even understand.
The whole reason we took the scenic route was to stop at a zoo in Eureka and a famous "sea glass
beach" in Fort Bragg, neither of which we ever laid eyes on.
Fail.
We decided to skip the zoo because it had been raining all morning (In July. So, you know, that totally makes sense) and after adding countless hours of hairpin turns along the coastal highway, Fort Bragg turned out to be Fort Drag. After searching unsuccessfully for the mythical glass beach, we were informed by a kindly older park ranger that, "They really should stop advertising that. All the glass has been picked up, and the tide is coming in anyway, so it's far too dangerous with kids."
Right.
At least there was an ice cream shop.
So back into car we all went, until we finally reached our destination roughly 17,869 hours later.
Luckily the kids were champs. I mean really.
It was Day 1 and they were just happy to be together.
No one threw a fit. Other than us having to tell them "You guys need to work it out" a couple of
times, no one really fought. There wasn't even any crying until the last thirty minutes.
We spent the next couple of days in Santa Cruz where we had some wins and some fails, but overall it was a great time.
There was the time we ventured out to the nearby town of Capitola, searched for parking for 12 minutes (which is a long time in a hot car full of pumped up children) , unloaded 2 giant snack bags, 2 beach bags, 5 children, and various beach toys, then trekked a couple of blocks down to the beach only go find it covered in dead fish and crowded with hundreds of children in red swimsuits doing drills in the sand. I'm not sure if it was a lifeguard camp, or a surf camp, or some kind of child-gang,
but the noisy crowd coupled with the pungent dead fish smell was enough to drive us out.
We actually thought about sticking it out, because all the other people didn't seem to mind or even notice the fact that we were surrounded by sandy, lifeless sardines- but then V started stabbing a dead fish with her sand shovel... and all it takes is one fish head landing by your towel to send you packing.
There was the time we went to the boardwalk and immediately decided we hated it. It was hot, dirty, crowded, none of the kids were into it, and a certain little boy proceeded to cry for a half hour upon arriving when he didn't win a Ninja Turtle prize after I paid $10 for him to throw 3 balls in about 4 seconds.
The carnival business is quite a racket.
There was the surprisingly hostile environment at the Jelly Belly factory where on two separate occasions old women were quite sour, for being in such a sweet place.
There was a moment I briefly considered leaving one of my children in Corning. Just kidding.
But really.Ah, but let's not forget the wins!
There was a delightful little restaurant called The Buttery...so that obviously needs no further explanation.
There were giggles and squeals and hours of play on the beach.
There was a moment in a Taco Bell on the last leg of our drive home, when the kids were coming unhinged and we were exhausted- we were basically a moving spectacle by this point- and when someone cracked a joke we just looked at each other, burst out laughing, and kept laughing until tears ran down our cheeks and the other Amber choked on her crunchy taco. It was awesome. After all, there aren't many things I enjoy more than a hearty laugh over a crunchy taco.
There was bonding and laughter and memories made
- which was exactly why we did it.
And we're all still friends.
My kids waited all of 15 hours after coming home before requesting to see their 3 beloved girls again, so clearly all is still right in the universe.
The Ambers are definitely fun and brave enough to continue the roadtrip tradition next year- although
we did learn a few things for next time:
1) Whatever number of water bottles you think you'll need for a long car ride- double it.
This will also double the number of potty stops, but by God, we can't let them go thirsty.
2) If you're wearing flip flops in the proximity of 5 littles, your toes will get stepped on multiple times a day. You will be expected not to mind this.
3) Crossing the street with 5 children is the equivalent of crossing the street with 5 drunks.
4) Never underestimate the power of candy. Also, never underestimate the power of promising a "surprise" ...even if you have no clue what that surprise is yet.
5) Anytime after hour 7 in the car, expect psychotic bursts of hysteria. Laughing and shrieking one minute, crying and wailing the next. The kids may do this also.
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